OWH, its nothing. somebody just said the wrong words =)

jz a little upset over the conversation i heard in tuition today. =)

She's retiring this Friday.
Puan Joginder. my beloved school head mistress <3
i dont know why, but i respect her ALOT. i love her!
there are things my friedns dont support about her, but i know its not for us to understand.
all i know is she is sincere and gives her best in what she is doing here in our midst. =)

i dont have to argue abt the decisions she made.
i have no rights to tell her the better way to do it.
how can i judge when im not even looking from her point of view?

its okay =) thay were just talking. but the part when they mentioned abt the back gate jz "pushed the wrong button".

hahhah! yes, they can be a little upset that its inconvenient to have to walk a whole big round because she wants it closed and locked up. the back gate was so much more convenient, i know.
but they shouldnt have said that she simply made up jokes and excuses to close it down. ==

why wud she? im sure the teachers took that decision after considering the best for us all.
i hate it. Their efforts and hard work and love behind the scenes are not being appreciated!

UNGRATEFUL PROUD SILLY CHILDISH IMMATURE STUDENTS!!

haha. explosion XD
whats wrong with walking a few extra metres anyway?!
its not like u're all old or disabled! (no offence! )
i mean, come on! we're young kids and u're complaining abt a few more metres!?
think abt the safety of those girls ! especially those who have been molested!
wow was i pisssed when i heard him saying that it wasnt true >.<
jz bcoz it didnt happen to YOU, it doesnt mean it hasnt happened to others!

i know how it feels to be molested.
it wasnt rape, i know. but it still sucks!
i had nightmares since then for a period of time.
dare some old man go around disturbing and scaring little innocent girls!

things like these have left bad impacts in people's lives!
hello? and u're still considering your few metres?!

im glad they closed down the back gate. cuz if i ever get to see that man again, i would have KILLED him XD

( no actually i would have peed in my pants and fainted ) XDXDXD LOL


hahhaha. im sorry im being so harsh here today XD

i just COULDNT stand it =)


it was a struggle to forgive him .
molester man XD

but i did ^^

love is a lifetime's lesson =)

keeping this post short =) sleepy tonight. . . jz have to say:
God is doing something in our hearts... at youth.
God is doing something in our church.
God is doing something grest in our country...
God is doing something great, in my life.
thanks God.
now i know.. why u allowed me to cry so much.
now i know.. why you said no.
now i know.. why you let me go through the hurts and pains.
now i know, Lord, how much you were protecting me.
now i know, how much you really care for me.
now i know, why u said i didn't have to understand why things happen.
now i understand, Lord.
now i see what you saw.
now i am thankful, and ashamed of myself.
and am grateful that you chose me among all.
that you saw me, through your eyes of mercy, of love and grace.
you'l never let me down.
i know =)
thank you Lord.
make me selfless.
let me love you.
let all i do reflect your glory.
let me make you proud.
let me make you smile.
this is my prayer, for the millionth time =)

i love you so much
what can i say to show how i feel??
there is no such word !

!!

notice:

missing best friend.
name: benjamin tham yue ern
description: short and extremely cute.
chubby face and pink rosy cheeks.
year of birth : 1992
age this year: 17
place last seen : penang, georgetown.
last school known : SK Batu Lanchang, penang.

kamparrrrr

those were the days . .

cant believe how fast time flies !
random memories =)

jj =)

ahahha

yo. peace
smiley smiley
meizhi birthday
ah po XD and ham sap. and me XD
hahahaha modelling days. i mean, DAY.
new year with disgustomaniac
camwhoring with stevee
fooling with rock and weekiat XD
blur pic of me(white, left) and my long lost benjamin =(
misss him.
took this with webcam XD
rmbr how dumb it felt XD
looking back at childhood dreams XD
count count count!!!
miss !

Beach Day , for weeky =)

sepang goldcoast beach
saturday 11 July 2009

it rocked !!

sweet memories !

XOXO

Storms in Life

learning to accept changes.
i have to admit,
this was never easy for me.
i hate changes.
i hate to adapt to new environments.
but this change has definitely blown my mind.
wondered more than once
why it stings so badly
as if it was me in the mess
couldn't find a valid reason why
i cried myself to sleep
that night, again.
it really felt like history repeating again
. flashbacks of old times.
when i used to sleep in my tears
while she boils her handphone porridge.
it used to be about me.
nobody cares. nobody cares.
nobody understands!
voices like these echoed always in me.
actually im grateful
that through this experience
i have come to see things at a new point of view.
i noticed the changes in myself
and in some ways
i am glad
that im not the same girl i was.
the room for improvement is the biggest room in the world,
they say.
i know there's much more to learn
the road is still a long way ahead
im sure its a bright and colorful one!
though it also contains the greys and blues
life is not always sunshine and no rain =)

currently things are going at a slow pace.
morning after morning
i struggled to trust in God
i know life is more than this.
i know He has much much more planned for me.
i know He has everything under control.
He knows what He is doing =)

just a lil worried for a dear brother.
very very dear to me indeed.
wept for him in the pain
i felt coming from his broken heart
i felt his hopelessness.
the emptiness and the helplessness.
prayed a thousand times,
God let me have a share of his burden
so that it wouldnt be too heavy for him..
but i guess it happened for a reason.
God will achieve His purpose.
i have to learn
how not to consider circumstances
and just to let go
and let God

just TRUST HIM!
i've seen Him at work in my life
=) i KNOW He can do anything.
and i love Him so much. love Jesus so much...

everything changed.
accept, adapt, move forward.
God never said that
there are not gonna be heartbreaks in life,
but He did say
He'l always always be there to wipe my tears away.

im glad,

somehow im at peace
in this storm.
i know...
i will survive,
because He loves me.

random.

i come in peace !!!

wedding =)

LIL bit about wedding ^^
**pics are from bottom up....
so bear wit the cacat ness. XD

below: drunk melody on the way home .
dizzy dizzy dizzy.. camwhore.. XD
saw a clown waving to me. kinda scary XD

seee! this creepy girl staring at me. goosebumps XD
two posers gila XD
wooo. nothing to say. just one word:
sweet!
hahahaha. love this pic. XD like in fairyland or something
me and my dearest. =) thomas law XD
hahahhaa again XD
caught Pastor Tan in 1st time new clothes! XD
and caught there two formally dressed
workers.. weird?
hahaha! he's curi tulang-ing !
and the manager is angry. sesat-ing XD
looks like she's saying "mangkuk!"
hey look! the other worker and his pet dog!
hahahahha. brocolli-like things
hahaha. worker working XD
smiley smiley girl
under my umbrella ella ella..
hahha. US!
THEM!
^^
YEAH. it rained.
hahahaa. hi jere =D
it was nice though it rained =)
poser dude with his long tongue XD
messy messy b4 the wedding!
very b4 the wedding. at pw sis' place. thats pw's nephew.
CUTE fella XD
aww..... nother poser
???
me ! and yeeling =)
hahaha. and how cool.
my bloggie's ending wit the first picture!!!

HOORAY. XD

x

XXXXXXXX . X


little worried for a friend.
have some sincere confessions to make.
been having some problems about forgiveness.
had this anger towards a friend of mine.
quite a number of my friends know about this.
really, really don't know why i felt like this..
everything in the past three months came flashing back.
so many things im not happy with.
so many words left unsaid..
but i still don't have the courage to say it..
angry with him.
angry with myself.
why did i let myself do those things?
why why why ???
confusion.
pain.
sorrow.
clouds of worry and guilt mixed with anger.
i wonder what was happening to me in the previous week?

i was protective, defensive.
maybe its pride? maybe its unforgiveness?

i dont know.
but on thursday, during our 1st holy spirit meeting
with pastor George
my heart melted and i said to myself
" i forgive him. because i love him, just like Jesus loves me. "
well..
yesterday we chatted a while..

found out he wasnt doing very well..
problems with his fam.
i prayed for him the night before.
just had the heart to do so.
i realised that God made us both.
God isnt defending me and accusing him.
God loves us both
hoping thet we'll learn to uphold each other in love.

i need to refuel.
im not entirely over the anger thing.
give it a little time.
im sure i'l be fine in God's hands =)

im sure he'l be great in God's hands =)
i know God has plans to prosper me,
not to harm me. ^^

i trust in Him completely.
and i mean completely =)

...

Holy Spirit !

excited ^^

loves!

thank you for everything